Satelite’s Blog

Namaste!
I am happy to welcome you all in my personal blog.

To be able to share through blog with everyone in today’s fast pace and computerize world is surely a good thing. We get in touch with so many things in life. Some writings disappear with time and some will inspire, till I get the time and support of my heart, I will try to write some through blog. My subjects could be on variety but cinema, literature and music are where my interest lies.

The impact and the importance cinema has on the life of a lay person has forever attracted me. The pleasure people drive by being in the theater for just few hours and the power, which the story subject’s caries are my inspiration. Since 2000 I have invested myself for cinema. I got admission on Nepal’s first cinema school but I got out of the college in few months. How long one could study without paying fees? I grew up in an environment where cinema does not hold much importance to get support for its study. No support from home for film study, I had to be expelled from college. No surprise !

I started my career as a spot boy in Nepali cinema. Directed by Daya R Dahal film ‘Daiva (God)’ was my first. Then I worked as a clap boy. I found no opportunity to learn even after working for couple of years, so I left. Our industry was using decade old outdated camera to shoot. Editing labs were screwed. Industry wasn’t professional I always wanted to enroll in best film school to learn the craft of filmmaking. Then I felt that now I should save some money and get myself into a good film school. This was back in 2002. I wanted to go somewhere abroad for this. I got a chance for a free trip to Dubai in 2003. There I became a Warehouse helper and then a truck driver. At the age of 21 I drove ISUZU and TATA trucks on the roads in Dubai and Abu Dhabi, Delivered televisions, washing machines, refrigerators, to the mansions of Arabians. Life for me have always been a mystery and adventurous.

It was in summer 2004; I took a part time job in a Lebanese restaurant as a Pizza delivery boy in Dubai. After working in Warehouse, I had to deliver pizza from 7 pm to 1:30 am. Management was pretty much fucked up; they gave me a car to deliver pizza but didn’t pay me until two months. I left pizza job after 2 & half month without getting salary, couldn’t complain anywhere as I wasn’t allowed to take part time job. Smoked a puff and forgot pizza job.

Time took me to Europe, Iraq, Afghanistan, America and many other countries. I worked, drank beer and vodka, and made noise. completed my Bachelor degree while working. I wanted to learn how to make movies but was unable to find the right path. I tried to get into some American and Mid Eastern film colleges. Did not have enough money saved nor had I done anything to get scholarship; I didn’t get in. All these hurdles were not enough to stop my persuasion. While working in the companies like FedEx I met some amazing friends like Jim, Wallace and Anesh who always not only inspired but supported me. Life went on.

With Jim I drank Monster and took trips out of Bagdad and Najaf to smoke grass and hash with Mathew. Cheered the wine glass with Wallace brought from Houston, Slept with beautiful American Army girls. Got drowned in the books of the library and with time, made mistake and fell in Love with a girl. Hugged many times in email, phones and Coffee Cafes. Said “like that” to those who said ‘I will die without you’. Like many other love stories mine also ended with tragedy but while I was in it, it was amazing.

I have no regrets in life. Experiences have matured me. The travel through the underdeveloped to the most dignified countries, societies, those places torn apart by war and the within found so many stories, the people and culture made me feel as if I was the most liberated and happiest man in the world.

There were many situations where I was in the delicate tread between life and death but life always won the game. The United States army helicopter ‘Apache’ which I took to leave Iraq was targeted. When I got down in camp Taji, in front of my eye was a huge fire and a blasted propeller. Being careful with the sharp nails of the grenade I lied in my bed inside the tent. I remembered my ex-girl, my mother and all those cinemas I would one day make. Death was passing through me constantly.

I don’t know if he did not see me or I sneaked him. Wouldn’t have given a damn if he had taken me. Even to live a life is like winning a worthless war.

Some of my friends think that I’m bloody nonsense, I thank them. To be happy all the time without being that is a difficult thing to be. When I want, I go for Vipassana meditation, I go to Dance bar or I reach village schools carrying books. In slippers I travel 13 hours flight or just to eat food I reach hospital canteens. If all these causalities give me happiness then why should I not be bloody nonsense?

I went to New York Film Academy and Los Angeles Film Schools with hopes to be admitted. Can’t figure what went wrong, came back after a month stay. Found myself tired then came back to my own country. Walked on my own mountains and got wet in rain. Everyone loves his or her own country but I am not a patriot. I find people of all countries are my own. The pain and suffering are same everywhere. If happiness and suffering are same everywhere then aren’t people just the same everywhere? by religion, color and community people cannot be in hierarchy. Experience taught me reality; there is no religion other than humanity.

But with all the responsibilities I guard, I have never forgotten my ambition on cinema. After 10 years of waiting now I am learning various stages of cinema making in Mumbai. I do not know what kind of stories I will write and cinemas I will make but now, at least I can try. Wanting and to become successful are two different things but after having proper skill, at least I can give a shot.

I like Clint Eastwood in Hollywood and Madhur Bhandarkar in Bollywood. Realistic cinema attracts me. I believe that when people watch cinema they should be able to identify with it. To learn the art of cinema making with people coming from around the world is an interesting venture.

The things I will be writing in this blogs are solely my personal perspective. To accept, what I write or not is totally matter of your choice. Neither I am elated nor sad on the opinions. I do not live thinking about what others are going to think. Nor do I think that everyone should accept what I think is right. People should live according to one self.

I am also a guy who has a positive outlook like you all. I also want to see the changed world. I also want to see all the roads clean and smooth and to see a university in every city of the world. I also want my country to be free from the riots, bands, and propagandas. I imagine a peaceful society. These changes cannot happen by me being in the politics. Businessman should do business. The labors should allow businessman to do their business. Teachers should have their rights to educate and the doctors should have rights to cure patients. Everyone should not get into the propagandas all the time. Can’t we do that when the country is more stable?

In leisure you can find me exercising in the Fitness Center in the college with the iPod plugged in my ears or you will find me playing something. I am just guessing but don’t be surprised to find me sleeping or dancing at times. I could be doing nothing as well.

To find me in Facebook, search satelite1983@gmail.com

May all be happy.

Satelite